Below is a very interesting question I received from a reader.  Maybe I’m reading too much into it, but I think there is a lesson worth sharing here…

So I go to a big SEC school with a solid Greek life and rushed this spring. During rush this spring I got really sick and could only attend a handful of events. This inevitably led to me only getting a bid at one frat. I decided to take the bid and go through the pledge process since the event I went to was alright, but it definitely wasn’t my favorite. 


Now I am about halfway through the pledge process and I am thinking about dropping and rushing again in the fall.

To make things easy here is a list of the reasons I want to drop:

Everything is very unorganized. I find out about most of our events two hours before they happen and or formal has doubled in price and the location has changed several times even though it’s in a month. I also lost a place to stay for spring break a week before break and right after I bought a plane ticket.

I’m not really close with any actives. The only people I hang out with are two pledge brothers who are also thinking about dropping. Plus half of the actives that signed up for our brotherhood retreat never showed up.

I got sick during rush and pledged the only bid I got and am not happy with where I am at. Should I drop and rush again in the fall or stick it out?

The answer to this situation is very clear – of course you quit. 

My initial thought and response is below:

All that said, the only reason I am answering this question is I am stunned at the volume of questions I get about brothers wanting to quit. Is this something new with the current generation of students? Do they no longer place any value on their commitments?

My advice – if you want to be successful in life, your word has to mean something. You have to be someone that can be trusted and someone that can be depended on.

If you aren’t, you will never have a successful personal or professional life. Rant over.

However, after giving this more thought – I think the answer is a little more complex…

I think the issue may be with you, and not the fraternity.  It seems like they don’t want you around.  The most telling bits of information are that you only received one bid, and that they dumped you a week before spring break.

The spring break thing is especially telling.  If my friends did that to me, I’d quickly realize that they weren’t my friends. 

I hope you quit this fraternity before you are initiated.  Go find a place where you are a better fit and where you belong.  You will be much happier as a result.

If you need more information on quitting a fraternity – check out this article:

How to Quit a Fraternity

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