This question was submitted by one of our readers. If you have a question you want me to answer go here to submit it: Fraternity Advice.
Question:
I joined a fraternity this fall because they stood for being different from other fraternities, and not just being a stereotype. Unfortunately, my experiences with them have proved otherwise, and I am losing interest.
Being in a colony process right now with them makes me disinclined to try and be part of a colony for yet another already established national fraternity. I would really like to start a brand new fraternity.
Fortunately, about half the men in my colony believe the same way I do, and could probably be convinced to start a new fraternity with me. Is it possible to do this? And if it is, how would I go about doing that?
Answer:
You question really has two parts.
First, you need to determine if you belong in your current fraternity. Since you haven’t quit yet, that tells me there is something that is keeping you quitting. You must like at least half of the guys, because you are talking about starting a new fraternity with them. You must determine if whatever is keeping you from quitting is strong enough to make joining a lifelong fraternity worth-while.
If it isn’t, and you cannot see yourself being happy in this fraternity for four years and beyond, then by all means quit. You will be doing everyone, especially yourself, a huge favor by quitting now. Don’t drag out the inevitable any longer.
I want to warn you though, as a new member you really don’t know what your fraternity is or will become. This is especially true for a colony. The fraternity you join as a colony will be worlds different than the fraternity as a chapter a few years down the road. If you stick with it, you will have a huge influence on what the fraternity becomes.
Second, if you want to start a new fraternity check out this article I wrote a long time ago: How to Start a Fraternity. This will give you the basic template on how to do that.
I want to warn you about a few things though.
Definitely don’t expect or try to take half of the colony with you if you decide to start a new colony. This is a jerk move on multiple levels.
Also, don’t for a second think that starting a new colony is easy. It is very difficult to do and you will not get to really see or enjoy the fruits of your labor until after you graduate.
Finally, don’t expect the quality of guys to increase suddenly because you are starting a new colony. Chances are, in a quest for numbers and getting your feet off the ground your new colony will take in every guy they can find.
Half will wash out and completely quit. The other half will be a mix of awesome guys and guys you can’t stand.
If I were in your shoes, I think you should stick it out. Keep in mind though that after you are initiated you will have crossed the point of no return and will not be able to start or join another fraternity. Sit down with some influential brothers and tactfully express your concerns. You might find that your concerns are the same as theirs.
This question was submitted by one of our readers. If you have a question you want me to answer go here to submit it: Fraternity Advice.