1 – Don’t be afraid to ask the sorority to have a mixer with your fraternity. For some odd reason, many fraternity men are intimidated by sororities. They will sit around during their fraternity meetings and complain for hours on end why there aren’t more fraternity mixers, but they will not have the gumption to actually ask the sorority to mix. Asking a sorority to have a mixer is a compliment. Don’t ever be shy about asking.
2 – Send a formal invitation. First, you have to meet with the sorority and figure out what you want to do. After you have agreed on the details, send the sorority a formal invitation inviting them to the fraternity mixer. Instead of mailing it, have your new member class hand deliver it. This will be a nice touch.
3 – Always stay classy. I know your fraternity brothers want the theme of the mixer to be a lingerie party or a bikini party. I hate to break it to you, but that isn’t going to happen. It is extremely tacky to suggest this as a theme, and will definitely put off the sorority. Always, always stay classy if you want to build a real relationship with the sorority.
4 – Don’t stress over selecting a theme. There are a bunch of themes that will work great with equal success. The one key to the theme of the mixer is there needs to be an active component to the event. The sisters and brothers have to do something together. For example, hold a joint philanthropy or go to a football game together. This will promote interaction and will make the event less awkward.
5 – Clean the house. If you are having the event at the fraternity house – clean it. When you think it is clean, clean it again because it is probably still nasty. Especially clean the bathrooms that your guests will be using. This is all about making a good impression and making your guests feel welcome.
6 – Be presentable. Shower. Shave. Comb your hair. Press your shirt. Stick your chest out and be proud. You are a fraternity man, one of the most elite on campus. Act like it.
7 – Make a T-shirt. This is a smart marketing move if done right. Make an awesome T-shirt that both the sorority sisters and fraternity brothers will like to wear. And when they wear it on campus, people will see that your fraternity has a relationship with the sorority. And that is a good thing.
8 – Take and post pictures on your fraternity website. Again, you want to get as much mileage out of the fraternity mixer as possible. During your next rush, you want to show your rushees how awesome the mixer was instead of just telling them. Also, this will encourage the sorority sisters to visit your fraternity’s website and learn more about your fraternity. Of course, always stay classy when posting pictures. Be smart and respectful.
9 – Make your requests wayyyyyyy in advance. Sorority calendars fill up fast. You will get left out in the cold unless you schedule months ahead.
10 – Have an exit plan. You don’t want to drag an event out forever. If you do, the last thought the sorority will have is that the fraternity mixer never ended and they couldn’t wait to get out of there. That isn’t good. Also, as always, be sure to have a DD plan in place.
11 – Say thank you. Send a hand-written thank you for the mixer. This is a courtesy that will be appreciated.
I want to give a special thanks to Rebecca, a sister of Alpha Delta Pi at Virginia Tech, for helping me on this article.
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